I’m Important; I’m on Wikipedia

Few SABR are notable enough–to the non-SABR–to merit a Wikipedia page. The “Major proponents of sabermetrics” section of the Wikipedia article on sabermetrics lists a lot of the usual suspects: Earnshaw Cook, Bill James, Sean Lahman, Voros McCracken, Rob Neyer, Nate Silver, Tangotiger, Keith Woolner. You get the point.

Though for someone who’s been writing about sabermetrics and baseball in general for less than two years and has contributed nothing of note either in terms of writing or research, isn’t it curious Carson Cistulli is mentioned as a “major proponent of sabermetrics?” He even has his own page.

I wonder what kind of anonymous contributor would go through the trouble of creating such an exhaustively-sourced article for an insignificant poet and wannabe deep thinker on baseball. Who could possibly care that in high school, Cistulli “began to seriously read poetry, including contemporary avant-garde poet Kenneth Koch, and began to explore writing?” And why bother with a bibliography, reviews, 19 external links, and 95 footnotes? John von Neumann only has 37 footnotes and he was like the greatest mathematician ever, or so Wikipedia tells me.


16 responses to “I’m Important; I’m on Wikipedia

  1. This is right up there with the Eric J. Seidman Kismet IMDB special.

    • Seidman’s IMDb biograpy by someone named “EJS”:

      Born on December 16th, 1985, in Philadelphia, there should have been no doubt that Eric J. Seidman would one day work in the world of movies. With his mother, Marci Seidman, a teacher who has read almost every book in existence, and his father Randy Seidman the Phillies, Sixers, and Flyers TV producer for PRISM and Sportschannel, it was kismet that Eric would one day work in the film industry.

      • I’m sure there are enough interested third parties out there to research Cistulli and piece that very detailed Wiki entry together on their own.

      • All the best writers of screenplays are required to use their page-a-day calendar vocab words no matter if they make sense in context or not.

  2. I looked at this entry and it looks like it’s more focused on his poetry which might explain the line about Kenneth Kotch?

    • Nice try, “Molly.” Or should I say, “World’s Biggest Carson Cistulli Fan?” Your French IP address is the very same one responsible for at least 101 of the 180 revisions to Cistulli’s Wikipedia page.

      • Actually, this is a universities computer lab. Each computer has the same IP address and there are thousands of students that use them, so please try to be more careful in the future Demosthenes.

  3. Well, I personally like Carson and his stuff over at FG… but that Wikipedia page is a fucking joke. Whoever wrote that has pathological, mental issues, or is named Carson Cistulli…. or both.

  4. This doesn’t warrant a post by itself, but someone from “Molly”‘s IP address created a section on the talk page of Cistulli’s Wikipedia article. She writes that when I said he “has contributed nothing of note either in terms of writing or research” it was a “probably erroneos [sic] claim.” How that is probably erroneous, I have no idea.

  5. Molly,

    I think most people here would agree that your wikipedia shrine to Carson Cistulli is either harmless or actually a net positive as your batshit insanity is mildly amusing. But please stop fucking up other wikipedia pages.


  6. I bumped into that page a few months ago and assumed that he was actually a notable poet/writer/something in his own right. I have no way to assess that assumption, because I don’t know a damn thing about contemporary American poetry.

    • I found this page googling his name for a paper. Our English teacher thinks he’s a good poet but I don’t know how he’s received in other countries.

      Best of luck with your baseball studies everyone.

  7. Molly u wanna make out.

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